DETROIT, MI - An upcoming report commissioned by the Health and Human Services Department ranks the lifestyle of the homeless among the healthiest in America. The report -
to be released early next week - ranked several demographic groups based on diet, exercise, and recreational activities, and included data gathered from across the nation. While maintaining
an apparent low quality of life, the homeless scored surprisingly well in each category of study...
(full story here)
|
MIAMI, FL - A local cable reality show is being sued for sexual and racial discrimination by an omni-racial transvestite band. The show, 'Where's Your Talent', eliminated the band from competition two weeks ago by a vote from the show's judges.
The suit seeks damages in excess of $1 million according to papers filed in district court.
The band, Boyz2Women, is a racially diverse group of young men, who typically don outlandish Vegas showgirl costumes and sing reggae versions of Broadway show tunes...
(full story here)
|
DENVER, CO - Researchers at West Northland University have released a study directly linking longevity to foot size. The groundbreaking publication culminates a ten year study of people between the ages of 80 and 100, and
included subjects from all walks of life. "It was a surprising conclusion, frankly." said Herman Littlepod, Professor of Geriatric Podiatry at the University and co-author of the study.
(full story here)
|
BRONX, NY - The lifestyle archives of The Daily Redundancy were eaten by a dog on Monday. Officials from the highly regarded cyber newspaper swore that they were not
making this up. "It's hard to believe, I know, but that's what really happened." said a top executive of the paper, who spoke with us on the condition of anonymity. "We'll just
have to start re-building the archive from scratch."
Veterinarians contacted by The Daily Redundancy say it's unusual for a dog to consume such a massive amount of material, but it's not impossible. "Given enough time, and access to plenty of water, it's entirely plausible that the
dog ate the archive." says Phillip Brownfinger, Doctor of Canine Gastrology at the Howyflyl Veterinary College. "I just wouldn't want to be the guy who has to walk him for the next few days."
Officials at the newspaper may ask for criminal charges in the case. "The dog may have some kind of vendetta." said the top executive, who would still only speak with us on the condition of
anonymity. "But we'll let the District Attorney decide, and we'll abide by his decision." Attorneys for the dog did not return phone calls placed by The Daily Redundancy.
|
