| Study: Big Feet Key To Long Life |
DENVER, CO - Researchers at West Northland University have released a study directly linking longevity to foot size. The groundbreaking publication culminates a ten year study of people between the ages of 80 and 100, and included subjects from all walks of life. "It was a surprising conclusion, frankly." said Herman Littlepod, Professor of Geriatric Podiatry at the University and co-author of the study.
"We expected lifestyle and geography to be more of a factor. But some subjects smoked and drank - some didn't, some exercised regularly - some didn't, and it didn't seem to matter where they lived. In the end, the only common denominator was that most of them had larger than average feet."
Skeptics were quick to point out that lifestyle cannot be completely taken out of the equation. "More study may be needed, but I would think that most people who smoke, drink and don't exercise wouldn't live to be 80 in the first place." said Patricia Whitecoat, Professor of Quantative Physiology at Howyflyl University. "But you can't ignore the facts. This big foot phenomenon has merit."
Researchers say funding for a supplemental study has been approved, but stress that research in a new direction is also needed. "A basic rule of science is to repeat the experiment." says Mort Finfisher, the other co-author of the report. "But we would be remiss to not ask the obvious questions: 'What are the inherent dangers of having small feet that seem to shorten life spans?' 'Is it a balance problem?' 'Are there
therapeutic properties in foot odor?' Right now, we just don't know"
Although compelling, the research team warns that people should not act on the results of the study just yet. "We're not ready to say that foot enlargement surgery may add years to your life." admits Littlepod. "But if you already have big feet, keep them."
© 2007 - The Daily Redundancy
